Taming the Alpha
by AndiCullen104
Summary: The Spirits are forcing Jacob to take on the title of Alpha, but first they have to break him. Will this new Alpha be able to finally talk reason into Bella or will she push him away not being able to handle this different Jacob? He is in touch with his wolf more than ever before territorial, dark, angry and fierce in his power. Will Bella be able to tame the Alpha?
1. Breakdown

Chapter One

Taming the Alpha

_So break me down if it makes you feel right_

_And hate me now if it keeps you alright_

_You can break me down if it takes all your might_

_'cause I'm so much more than meets the eye_

_~ Breakdown by Seether_

**A/N- Thank you to my Beta Khyharah for making this chapter pretty! You are awesome.  
**

JPOV

I stood in the shower, letting the water cascade down my body. My head was under the spray and I had no intention of moving. I rested my hands on the wall and prayed to the Spirits that the agony I was in would wash away with the water. I turned the shower dial to make the water hotter but it didn't affect me in the slightest, and I sighed heavily.

I closed my eyes and put the hands resting along the wall into tight fists. I could feel my nails digging into my flesh but the pain of it didn't distract me from the blackness that hung heavy in my heart. I squeezed my eyes shut tighter as the image of her face came to my mind. The last time I had seen her when she told me that she didn't love me _enough_ when I had gotten injured in that damn battle.

Fuck, it hurt so bad.

The minutes dragged on, but for the life of me I couldn't leave the shower. Today was the day I was cleared to leave the bed by Dr. Fang. But instead of finding joy in my freedom, I was hiding in here. I didn't want to have to look at my Dad and see that I was breaking his heart by loving a girl who just didn't love me _enough_.

I was so sick of that word.

Silent tears slid down my face and mixed with the water that by now had gone cold. The temperature still had no affect on my supernatural body, but I wanted to feel something; something other than the pain that was choking me.

Not enough. Never enough.

~~~~~TTA~~~~~~

I pulled on a clean pair of sweats and jumped out of my window. There was no way I could face Dad right now, and for some reason my wolf wanted out. He was restless and needed to be outside in his woods. He was tired of being cooped up in bed. Yeah well me too, buddy.

Once under the cover of the trees I thought I would be able to calm down, but things just intensified. I continued moving in my human form deeper into the forest as if I could get away from the pain the farther I walked. The wind whistled through the trees and I could scent rain in the air. No animals could be heard and I knew that a storm was coming. As I walked I felt my skin began to tingle and my breathing became more labored.

I thought I knew the lands of La Push, that I had explored everywhere that could be explored, but the more I walked the more lost I became. For a brief second I considered phasing but I felt something pulling me into the dark depths of the forest. The pull was uncomfortable and made me worry more but I couldn't go back. I couldn't make myself turn around. It was as if my feet had a mind of their own and kept trudging along.

I don't know how long it'd been and I idly wondered if anyone was looking for me. Surely the pack could track my scent, but something twisted in my gut as if I subconsciously knew that I was not going to be found.

_Jacob_.

I stopped at the sound of my name. The voice had the deep timbre of an Alpha to it. My eyes scanned the pitch black forest looking for who had called me. There was no one in sight and I couldn't hear anyone in the clearing I was currently in. I called upon my wolf for guidance yet all I could feel from him was submissiveness. He recognized the voice, but offered no help to me.

"Who's there?" I breathed out lowering my eyes to the ground in respect to the presence that I could now feel but not see.

_I am Taha Wi, young Jacob._

"That's not possible." The wind spun the leaves on the ground as I heard the throaty chuckle of the man who couldn't possibly be the son of Taha Aki, I wondered how many drugs Doc Fang pumped into me to make me hallucinate this.

_You have fought your birthright, Jacob. You fight your wolf, constantly battling for control._ Taha Wi's disappointment clouded over me for a second and I had to blink several times to try to clear my mind.

"I don't want it. Sam can be Alpha for as long as he wants, I don't care about any damn genetics that say I have to be the leader." I ground out through my teeth, angry that he thinks he has the right to tell me how to live my fucking life.

_Good. Get angry young Jacob. You will need it._ I tried to move my feet so I could get the fuck away from this shit, but I my body wouldn't move.

"Let me go," I said shaking from the exertion I was putting in to leave.

_Jacob Ephraim Black, your destiny has been foretold by the Spirits. You will take your place as Alpha of the Quileute pack. The Spirits will be forcing you to undergo the Alpha change, the rite of passage._

"What the fuck?! I don't fucking want this! I will not be an Alpha."

_Remember your anger, young one._

~~~~~TTA~~~~~

A gust of wind picked up and I could faintly hear chanting in Quileute, however that didn't hold my attention for long. I felt fire roar inside of me and I could literally feel my skin burst into flames. I looked down at my body to see if I really was being roasted alive but there was nothing giving away to the fact that I was burning up other than the shaking of my limbs.

The pain just got worse from there as the bones in my legs snapped as if I was about to turn into the wolf. The bone reformed back human legs though. I sighed in relief before wailing out in sheer agony as I felt the bones in my body snapping and muscles moving to phase yet nothing happened. The sounds of my screams drowned out the chanting and tears soaked my face as my body kept trying to phase and instantly going back to normal. Back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. And so on.

Time passed. It could have been seconds or a whole damn week for all I knew. My mind could not comprehend anything beyond the torture from continuously being on the edge of phasing and instantly coming back from it. Somehow I had fallen to my knees though I couldn't remember the fall. My screams that had filled the clearing had long ago since faded only left me to whimpering and begging. Begging that the Spirits have mercy on me, but they never let up on my suffering.

The pain was so intense that I began to start to feel numb. It was as if my mind and body could no longer process the pain anymore, that it had reached its limit. My body was still rocking back and forth between almost phasing but I was blissfully unaware of the pain. I certainly could feel the phase but I was no longer hurting. Closing my eyes and relishing in the feeling of being disconnected from the agony, my eyes turned up to the sky. I noticed that it was light out once more so I must have been there all night or longer.

Slowly my body halted into complete stillness and I felt my eyes roll into the back of my head as I passed out.

**A/N- Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter and I would love to hear your thoughts on it. I have four more chapters written out, so if you review, I may be tempted to update faster ;) If you don't want to wait, because you really want to know what happens next you can find this story on Tricky Raven (I am AndiCullen104 over there). Please note that I would really hope you'll leave me some love there too if you find me at TR. Okay I'm done talking... **


	2. Welcome To My Life Part I

Chapter Two Welcome to My Life Part I

Taming the Alpha

Written by AndiCullen104

Beta-ed by Khyharah :)

**A/N- Thank you so much for the reviews on the first chapter. You guys are amazing! Now without further ado...**

**Warning- This chapter has an allusion to abuse, please do not read if you are triggered by this.**

_Do you ever feel like breaking down?  
Do you ever feel out of place,  
Like somehow you just don't belong  
And no one understands you?  
Do you ever wanna run away?  
Do you lock yourself in your room  
With the radio on turned up so loud  
That no one hears you're screaming?_

_No, you don't know what it's like_  
_When nothing feels all right_  
_You don't know what it's like_  
_To be like me_

_~Welcome to My Life by Simple Plan_

JPOV

Darkness surrounded me, enveloped my being. My body felt heavy and I couldn't remember a single thing. I felt like I should be feeling and remembering something but every time I tried to grasp at that something it would float away. Leaving me empty handed and with no idea what was going on. Time moved slowly, and I briefly wondered if I had died.

I don't remember dieing.

I'm not even sure if I like how death feels if that is what happened. The plus side nothing hurts. Downside is I know there is something I'm supposed to aware of and I have no clue what that should be. To top it off, I can't even feel angry about it, because it's almost like emotions doesn't exist here.

Were there ever emotions? Have I always been like this?

I'm just going to slip away.

~~~~~TTA~~~~~

_Jacob._

_Huh?_

_Jacob._

_W what? I'm here or I think I am._

_Watch, young Jacob._

_Okay._

~~~~~TTA~~~~~

The darkness slowly began to lighten and I watched as colors began to swim in my vision momentarily blinding me. I closed my eyes against the drastic change, doing my best to clear my foggy brain. I knew the presence was with me, but I couldn't see him only feel the shimmer of his mind. It reminded me of something but I couldn't for the life of me remember.

_Watch._

_Alright._

I looked into a home that seemed to tickle my memory yet nothing came to mind. It was a modest home with an old TV and a large very used sofa in front of it. There was carpeting and there was a shelf lined with pictures and books along the right wall with a large window on top of it. The day was overcast but let in enough light that I could see around this living space.

_Where is this? Have I been here before?_ I asked him. I felt the absence of my emotions as if I were hollow it was weird. I waited for a response yet none came however a little boy walked into the living room. He was small if I had to guess I'd say five or six years old. The boy idly brushed his long ebony hair out of his face and took a small action figure out of his pocket. I watched him play all by himself, using his imagination, to take him to a different world.

A woman came into the room with a small smile on her face as she watched what I assumed to be her son play. She was very thin and was wearing a blue sundress with a white flower pattern. She tucked her black hair behind her ear as she watched her son bounce around the room.

The moment was shattered when the boy spoke.

"Mama, my friend Joey wants to know why I don't have a Daddy." He said staring up at her with a serious expression on his face.

"Embry none of this nonsense!" She paused before continuing. "You don't even have a friend

named Joey." His mother replied the smile and lightness to her face gone. She had her lips pursed in anger but there was a pain so deep in her eyes.

"He is to real!" The boy pouted stubbornly.

"No he is not!" She turned her back on him as she stared into another room.

"I just want a Daddy." He whispered quietly. The woman wiped the tears from her eyes before leaving the room.

Darkness overcame my vision once more as I was pulled from the boy and Mother.

_Who were they?_ I think I knew them.

_Watch, Jacob._

_Fine._

I felt a tugging sensation and when I opened my eyes I found myself in the forest. It was raining heavily and again the familiarity of it filled me yet nothing came to mind. I was emotionless and if I did have my feelings I'd be pretty pissed that I can't remember a damn thing when I know these places. Or at least I think I do.

A large dark wolf sprinted into view well actually more like tumbled into the scene. I can feel the vibrations of the ground from its impact. The blinding panic of the animal was clear to anyone who could happen upon this beast. I watched it take out a tree and heard a snap of its bones neither slowed him down. I followed it as it ran sometimes he would go in complete circles and he fell quite a bit. A little niggle filtered in my brain, but I couldn't place where I had seen this before.

Time moved quickly and I watched as the wolf lost energy. I could see the desperation in its eyes and the way he was going to waste away without nourishment. I really thought that this animal was going to die, but with just a small amount of his energy that he had left, I saw him take down a deer. He ate as much as his stomach could take and with blood dripping down his muzzle he let out a howl crying out for his pack. Though I knew he was a lone wolf. For now. That thought cameout of nowhere, but was gone before I could process it.

The next scene landed me in a small kitchen with a three person family eating dinner. It was tensely silent. I bet you could hear a pin drop from a mile away. The little boy sitting there was picking at his vegetables carefully keeping his eyes on his plate not at all glancing at the man or woman. His shoulders were hunkered down as if he was waiting for a rebuke at any moment.

I guess he was.

"Boy, do you not appreciate the meal your Mama made?" The man said looking down on his son with black eyes full of hate.

"Paul was just um... lost in his thoughts, right Paul?" His Mother said shakily as her eyes darted between the man and her son. Paul's wide eyes stared at his father in panic not being able to answer. He was so afraid that I can see the trembles racking his tiny frame. His silence caused a violent reaction in his father as he threw his plate across the table at him. The little boy was quick enough to dodge the glass plate that was aimed straight for his chest. This must not be new.

I felt like I should feel something at this point but I was completely void of any and all emotions.

"Run Paulie," she ordered him. The little boy did not need any more incentive and took off like a bat out of hell. I was pulled after him and saw him rush into what I imagined was his room. It was cluttered with toys and mess. Paul pulled open his closet and shut it behind him. I could hear his quiet whimpers and prayers that she would be alright.

In the kitchen I could hear thuds, curses, and the tearing of clothes.

"Please! No!" She cried out.

"Shut up, bitch."

I was yanked out of there so fast that my head spun. Now I definitely knew I should be feeling anything, anything at all, yet I was a complete blank.

**A/N- So what did you think? I'd love to hear your thoughts. Thanks for reading!**


	3. Welcome To My Life Part II

Chapter Three Welcome to My Life Part II

Taming the Alpha

Written by AndiCullen104

Beta-ed by Khyharah :)

**A/N- Thank you to all who are reading this story and to those who review! You guys truly keep my muse happy. ;)**

**WARNING- Dark themes! If you are triggered by this please do not read.  
**

_To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
And no one's there to save you  
No, you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life_

_~Welcome to My Life by Simple Plan_

JPOV

This time I was in a bedroom, nothing at all tickled my memory here. It was dark outside yet it was very warm in this room almost too warm. The bed was unmade and the room itself smelled stuffy and gross. Shoes, clothes, and purses were strewn about the room so I knew that a woman lived here.

_What are we doing here? No one is even here._

_Watch._

_You know that is getting really old real fast._

_Watch._

_Whatever._

I didn't have to wait long before I heard someone breathing heavily while he or she pulled someone along. The door to the bedroom eased open and there was a girl who looked eleven or twelve all but dragging a woman into the bedroom. The girl had her arm wrapped around the woman's waist and moved slowly to get her to the queen sized bed.

"It's okay, Mom. Just a little more to go." The girl comforted her Mom when she had groaned.

Finally they reached the bed, which she helped her Mother lie down and tucked her in. I watched her brush the short brown hair from the woman's face.

"I'm going to make dinner, okay? Um stay here and try to get some sleep." The child told her Mother as if she were the child.

"Bella get me a bottle of whiskey, please baby? Mama needs something to make the pain go away." Her mother grimaced not even bothering to look at her daughter.

"Mom, I really think you've had enough. How about I make you some soup, or if you're not up to it, I'll bring you some crackers. Does that sound good?" She asked softly.

"I said I want a bottle of whiskey. God Bella, you never fucking listen!" She paused. "Why do I have such a useless daughter?" She grumbled to herself but loud enough for Bella to hear. I could see tears gather in Bella's chocolate brown eyes, but she forcefully blinked them away.

I was pulled into another scene with Bella and her Mom, but there were also two men sitting in the kitchen with them. Beer bottles lined the counter and a pile of a couple day's worth of dishes was left in the sink. Bella was sitting pushing her food around her plate while fidgeting; I could tell she was uncomfortable here. The Mother was having a good ol' time with the men chattering away drunkenly and waving her hands around as she talked. Her movements were uncoordinated yet that didn't seem to faze her.

"Bella, why don't you go do your homework sweetheart. Let the grownups talk. I mean how many F's did you receive on your report card?" She giggled. "My girl will only be good for her looks and even then it's a touch and go. I mean just look at her, what boy would see anything in her?" Bella's face was red as a tomato and she quickly shot out of her seat and rushed out of the kitchen.

_I know her,_ I told the presence in my mind. At least I think I do.

_Why can't I feel anything? I know this should cause some sort of reaction in me._

No response.

The colors around me swirled as another vision swept me from the room. When everything stopped moving, I took a look around to where I had been taken. I was now in a bathroom where a woman with long ebony hair flowing down to her back sitting in the tub. There were scars covering her russet skinned arms, so many of them that they laid on top of each other. Some were scabbed so they were fairly recent, but others seemed older.

She was crying softly, holding something in her hands that I couldn't see.

"Leah, you home?" Someone called from downstairs.

"Uh yeah, just a minute Mom." She scrambled out of the tub, dropping something shiny on the floor in her haste. Leah pulled down the sleeves of her shirt down to cover the horrendous scars that littered her arms.

I watched her wipe away her tears, and she took deep slow breaths. The pain she was feeling so was clearly written on her face. So much I had seen so far and I felt the need to have my emotions back. I was watching people's most private moments and couldn't feel a damn thing. I was so numb. All I could do was watch the horror of their lives, all the while feeling as if I knew them, yet not being able to remember them.

I was gone from the room within a blink of an eye and felt myself being pushed into another place. I was in a dirty living room. It looked similar to the one where I had seen the little boy Paul, but I saw a baby in a play pen. The woman from the other vision seemed younger as she rushed around the house in a hurry. She was looking for her bracelet before spotting it on the shelf that held the dusty TV. Paul's Mom clipped it into place just as a knock came from the door. I watched her leave the scene and I could hear her greeting someone.

She came back in the room with a young teenager. I recognized her from the vision with Embry but there was a major difference between what she was like in the previous memory than what she was like in this one. Embry's Mom didn't look at all haunted, she was so full of life here. I briefly wondered what had caused her to become so broken.

"Okay so you know the routine, right Tiffany?" Paul's Mom asked the young girl.

"Yes Mrs. Lahote, Paul is in good hands with me." She smiled reassuringly. Mrs. Lahote nodded and left the house.

"So it's just you and me, baby." Tiffany cooed at Paul. She fed and changed him before going into the nursery. She came back without him, so I assumed she had put him down for a nap. I watched as she turned on the TV and was about to settle in for the night. Not a few minutes later, heavy footsteps could be heard on the walkway to the house. Tiffany was engrossed in her show so she didn't hear the front door opening and closing.

"What the hell are you doing in my house?" Mr. Lahote slurred as he staggered into the room.

Tiffany got up from the couch with surprise. Apparently she was not expecting anyone to be coming home.

"Oh hi, Mr. Lahote. I just came to watch Paul. I didn't know you would be coming home, I can go now. Paul is down for a nap so he shouldn't wake up anytime soon." She said quickly as her eyes darted around the room in her nervousness.

"You are a pretty little thing," he mused aloud. "I like pretty little things."

"Um my parents are probably expecting me home now, I should really go." Tiffany tried to say bravely but her voice shook. Mr. Lahote began to walk forward purposefully, and the look on his face let me know that he was getting off on her fear. He backed her into a corner, and I knew what was going to happen. There was no way she could fight him off; she couldn't run because even in his drunken state he would catch her.

Her cries were the last thing I heard before the room began to spin taking me somewhere else.

When I came to, I saw Bella in bed asleep she was older and the room was chilly. I looked to see that the window was open, letting in the breeze. A boy jumped in through the window, his bronze hair stuck up in all different directions. His bone white skin and stench should have stirred my emotions, but again I didn't have any here. He walked towards the bed and laid down wrapping his arm around Bella.

He began whispering in such a smooth almost seductive voice in her ear. I couldn't hear what he was saying but it caused distress in Bella as she tried to move out of his stone cold embrace. He held on tightly to her continuing to whisper in her ear. She began to mumble and I swear she was repeating what he was saying. A smirk spread across his too perfect features as he continued to speak softly to her.

I couldn't hear what they were saying; it was like I was listening from under water.

I so wished I could be pissed right now, but I don't even remember what that feels like.

**A/N- Thanks for reading! Reviews keeps my muse going ;) **


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